Diversity and Equality

I think in my blogs I have seemed very optomistic about Kosovo as a country and about the Kosovar culture. If you haven't noticed that, I am. I really love living here, I love the people, and I love the relaxed style of life. As great as it is to live here, some of the politics and the conservative has been getting to me a little bit.

I'm sure all of you readers know me, I can't really imagine that this blog has reached people that didn't follow my facebook link or my e-mails. Since you know me, you know that I grew up in San Francisco, a liberal paradise in the U.S. Living in San Francisco instilled me with a strong sense of equality, whether it be racial, gender, or sexual preference. Living in Kosovo now, I see all sorts of these equalities completely blurred and turned upside down.

Of course, I've talked about the ethnic tension here between Serbians and Albanians. That is kind of obvious.. at least to me. But what might not be as obvious, is the idea of 'diversity' here and what it means. When I think of diversity, I think of every kind of person imaginable living in a single community. It doesn't necessarily have to be harmonious living, but at least different races, socio-economic backgrounds, etc. Diversity can mean a lot of things. Diversity here is something quite different, if it exists at all. There is little to no religious diversity, with almost every Albanian being Muslim (there are a few Catholics here), and almost every Serbian being Orthodox (there are not many Serbians anyways, at least in Pristina). There is no real racial diversity. There are not even any Serbians in Pristina. If you see someone of African American descent, I can tell that every single person on the street notices this person - and stares. And obviously is a foreigner working for NATO or another foreign government agency. I have only seen two Asian people the whole time I've been here. I constantly have the feeling that everyone is staring at me as I walk down the street because they can tell that I am a foreigner and that I am different. I don't mean staring at me in a negative way, but it is that if you do not fit in and do not conform to some sort of mould, then it is noticed... And that makes me feel a bit awkward.

There is, of course, socio-economic diversity, however it is not as apparent in Pristina as it is other places in the country. As I've said in previous posts, the average income is around 150 Euro a month. A lot of people in Pristina make more than that, purely because it is the capital, and because of the foreign presence in the city, which includes NATO, UN Mission in Kosovo, European Union Mission in Kosovo, European Council, USAID, foreign banks like Raffeisen and ProCredit... just to name a few. They employ some locals, however the local employees do earn less than foreigners. Anyways, since most of these organizations are centered in Pristina, it is natural that this city has the highest income. However, it is once you leave the city that you really feel extreme poverty. In Pristina, there are some beggers, Roma children trying to sell you peanuts or beg for money, however there are not as many as I anticipated before I came here. At night at a cafe, it really does not feel as though most people here only make 150-200 Euro a month. Everyone dresses up and looks nice, orders drinks, stays out late.. it simply does not feel like people are struggling to earn money. I am sure that many of these people are in fact struggling, or are unemployed, however they do not act like it. This makes the diversity feel like there is less than it is in reality.

Now, since I am interning for a women's organization, I am sure you are expecting me to be all feminist about gender equality here - and I will not disappoint you! The unemployment rate for women here is higher than it is for men. The figures that my organization told me is that for men it is around 40%, and for women it is 60%. A lot of the inequality and reasoning for this comes from the cultural stereotypes that it is a woman's job to raise the family. Women here get married very young (rewind to when someone told me I will be too old to get married when I am 24), and especially in villages, women stay home and have children, and a lot of them. Women aren't expected, or encouraged, to find jobs and a steady income outside of their household. There are many cases of domestic violence (that will be a separate blog entry), and women simply cannot do anything about it. The divorce rate is incredibly low, and women often do not get custody of their children after a divorce. Things are changing though, and there is a slow progress. Each generation, like everywhere in the world, becomes more "western" (I don't really love this term, but it certainly applies here), and more "modern" in terms of gender relations. Women here, unlike most Muslim countries, do not cover up, instead they readily expose a lot of skin. More and more women are finding work and providing for their families, thanks to organizations like Women for Women. It is only in many traditional families that these old stereotypes are being held firmly in place. Still, in general, the gender divide exists, and is far from equal.. even in simple things, like when a male friend of mine told me that here a women would never break up with a man she is dating, he always breaks up with her, because a woman's goal is to find a husband and does not want to end in a relationship.

Now, what really motivated me to write this blog is what recently happened in Belgrade. Of course Belgrade is not Kosovo, but I think generally the attitudes in the Balkans towards homosexuality is the same. There was supposed to be a gay-pride march in Belgrade, however it was canceled because there were many threats against the gay marchers, and the government felt as though it could not provide security for the participants. You can read about that here: http://www.balkaninsight.com/en/main/analysis/22369/

Someone in Kosovo then told me that Kosovo was more open-minded, and I thought, well is it? It turns out, not really. The same news agency, Balkan Insight, (which I highly recommend if you want to read about the news here in English), printed a story around the same time about homosexuals in Kosovo: http://www.balkaninsight.com/en/main/analysis/22403/

Soon after I read this, by coincidence one of my male friends here told me he is bisexual. He said he was only telling me and several of his friends because I'm an international, so I won't feel have as a conservative of a view as many locals. He said that if he had told his friends that he was actually gay, and not bisexual, then he would be "lost forever" and there would be no hope for him. He said there was almost no way that he could ever find a partner here because there is almost no gay community to speak of out of fear of discrimination or harm. He does not know any openly gay people, and doubts it will change any time soon. He seemed so sad and hopeless when he told me this, I felt awful. But that's just the culture here, and I guess it is the same in most (or all?) Balkan countries. For some reason, I expected something different of Kosovo, from a country that is fighting hard for its independence and claims to be so open-minded. A country with unparalleled foreign presence and people who desperately want some sort of 'change'. It was silly of me though to have such high expectations. Not everyone though is against homosexuals, like I said I have a bisexual friend, and know other people who have said that they don't think there is anything wrong with homosexuality.. however, it seems the general feeling is strongly homophobic and unaccepting.

Of course, despite all of these things, I still love Kosovo. I have to remind myself that Kosovo is a developing country, meaning it only just got its independence (well, to some), and it is still figuring itself out. I don't think there is a real Kosovar identity yet, everyone calls themselves Albanians or Serbians, not Kosovar. These issues don't really seem to be high on their list, or even on anyone's list. Everyone in Kosovo focuses mainly on the political and independence issues; these issues are critical for Kosovo's future as a nation. However, the diversity and equality problems in Kosovo are very important for me, and I felt as though I needed to highlight them. I also wanted to note that as positive as I sound about Kosovo, there are a lot of issues, many that people don't even care to acknowledge.